Are you looking for more calm satisfying experience with you daily life?
Do you get frustrated with yourself at the end of the day because you've gotten stressed, unfocused or agitated?
Are you tired of getting over emotional and worn out.
Whether you are experiencing one or all of these feelings here are my 5 best tips on reducing the unwanted feelings so that you will feel calm and satisfied with yourself each day.
1. Catch yourself when you exhibit a feeling of behavior that you don't like and change it.At first you may not notice the feeling until after you have gone through it, that's fine.
Think about how you would rather have felt.
Think about how you would rather have handled yourself. Decide how you want to do it next time.
As you continue with this process each day you will find that you will notice more easily what you are doing throughout the day.
You will begin to catch yourself earlier and earlier as you do this.
Eventually, you will be seeing yourself while you are doing it, then stop yourself.
At some point you will be able to notice before you even begin to feel and react in the undesirable way.
Here is where you will actually begin to change the way you react to the situations in your life and change your behavior.
2. Stay centered all day by refocusing throughout the day.Develop the habit of paying attention to your mindset as the day goes on.
Several times a day, step away from what you are doing to get re-centered.
Sit down close your eyes and take several long slow deep breaths while imagining the tension washing slowly out of your body.
Notice your breathing getting slower and calmer.
Just think about your breath.
Try to keep from thinking about anything in particular.
It's ok to not be actively thinking for a while!
3. Watch out for your expectations.You are setting yourself up for failure, upset and frustration when you set too many standards as to how you think things should be.
Think about what leads you to getting upset?
Why does it upset you?
Notice that you decide how many things should be, based on your own outlook and desire.
The things others do that are not to your liking, even the things you do that don't match your expectations.
Ask yourself, really how important is it that they be exactly that way
Ask, who am I to insist that they are that way?
Does it matter that much?
Is it worth getting myself worked up about?
Choose which expectations are really important for you to hold on to and which ones are not.
Holding on to many expectations just complicates your life, with constant judgment.
Simplify your life and reduce the stress!
4. Delegate.This applies to your personal life as well as at work.
Most of us think of delegating as a workplace skill, but it can apply personally as well.
We are all very busy these days with our activities and duties.
Trying to fit it all in and get it all accomplished can lead to tension.
For various reasons, many of us have developed the habit of thinking we must do it all ourselves.
Take a look at your situation.
Think about it, really, how important is it that everything must be done perfectly to your standards?
Are you sure there are not other people who can assist you. Are the other people in your life pulling their weight?
Many times we get into habitual ruts that don't need to be as they are.
Look at what has been, with the eye of reducing the pressure on yourself.
5. Accept other people as one.As you think of yourself as different and separate from the rest of mankind, you unknowingly create thinking and behavior that separates you from others.
This kind of separate thinking leads us to think we are superior to others which leads to judgment then selfish thinking and behavior.
We are then having an internal battle with others, which brings on fear, competition and comparison, ending in frustration and anxiety.
Look to discovering how to see yourself as one with all of mankind, not as separate.
Focus on what we have in common rather that the relatively small uniqueness.
Author BioJohn Halderman is a writer, speaker and trainer, dedicated to helping people with getting real results with their personal development efforts. He supports strategies, methods, tools and information that actually bridge the gap between information and effective results. Go to www.activepersonaldevelopment.com for free information and newsletter.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Couple caught on video having sex in Toronto subway
As reported by the Toronto Sun
When the young man and young woman began making love on a southbound University line coach around 2:30 p.m. Sunday, a disgusted passenger pressed the yellow emergency strip.
After the train's guard finished putting the brakes to their tryst, the apparently drunken pair moved onto the Spadina station platform and continued the horizontal shuffle on the tile floor — with the man's naked bottom and her naked legs caught on video by a passerby.
There are funny stories, sad stories, exciting stories, mysterious stories, and then there is just plain old dumb. The story, mentioned above, clearly falls into the dumb category. Good grief, I've heard of the Mile High Club, escapades in the back row of a nearly empty movie theatre, back seat mumbas, and the like, but 2pm-on Christmas-on the subway?? C'mon, world. Fun is fun, but this speaks to our new careless sexual natures. Contain your nasty fantasies to your bedroom, at 1 am or in the shower, like some of us. LOL... How many children to you think saw those two love birds do the Cupid's Shuttle on the subway (at 2pm). Does anyone really care about the kids, or do we just like to pretend?
In the U.S., I blame the apparent Hugh Hefner-like mentality of the F.C.C. Have you noticed the boarder-line R-rated TV commercials that seem to aire during family TV time (such as Football games). I'm not a prude...Trust me, but I really don't like explaining erectile dysfunction to my nieces and nephews, or stumbling to answer my little girl's questions regarding KY jelly. Can't a man just watch the Family Guy in peace? Ooops, bad example.
This is truly having an affect on the world. We are creating a world of over-sexed, callous, narcissistic hypocrites. And then, as Americans, we seem to have the nerve to push our dastardly way of life onto other regions. Are the Muslims sooo wrong for pointing out where America can morally improve? I saw a twelve year old girl the other day, in a restaurant. She was with her mom and was wearing make-up, high heels, and had an Iphone attached to her nose. I must've been the only person to find this odd because no one seemed to notice. I guess it's all too common place nowadays. High-heels??? Really?? C'mon, mom. Take a second to stop blaming your Ex for all your problems and teach these little girls how to be young ladies.... I'm just saying.
I'm not trying to fix the world or anything. What I'm saying isn't any sort attempt at altruism. I'm just saying, it would be nice to experience kindness and decency whenever I step out in public or watch public television. But, where do we start?
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Facebook Can Lead to Your Doom!!!
By: LA Williams
People, I implore you to not use Facebook as your personal conduit, connecting your egotistical, narcissist, bubble of an existence with the outside world. The old scripture says that "what is done in the dark will come to the light." Today, facebook inhabitors are idiotically turning the light onto their own sins and are shocked at the repercussions they incur. I'm not saying hide your sins. One should acknowledge and deal with their sins accordingly. However, sites like Facebook records your deeds and will force you to deal with these issues publicly and embarassingly.
People, I implore you to not use Facebook as your personal conduit, connecting your egotistical, narcissist, bubble of an existence with the outside world. The old scripture says that "what is done in the dark will come to the light." Today, facebook inhabitors are idiotically turning the light onto their own sins and are shocked at the repercussions they incur. I'm not saying hide your sins. One should acknowledge and deal with their sins accordingly. However, sites like Facebook records your deeds and will force you to deal with these issues publicly and embarassingly.
Pictures of your life, as it unfolds are nice, but I find it a bit over-zealous for some Facebookers to have the need to post hundreds of random pictures of themselves in the bathroom mirror...mostly for some sort of public acknowledgement. Get over yourself already... "You look good, Girl... How many times do you need us to tell you that?"
Remember, Facebook records everything. I have a friend who's been with his girlfriend for five years. Through the years, she's always presented herself as the loyal, hardworking, honorable type. The only annoying thing about her is that she tends to pass slight judgements against other people's minor indecretions. But, it was ok because she was the everything she claimed to be--honest, faithful, and eyes for only him. Well, her home computer went down a couple of months ago and recently, my friend decided to try to repair the computer himself. He was, surprisingly, successful. The computer rebooted, with all the bells and whistles. Proud of his accomplishment [guys love to play the role of hero for their girls], he pulled up tabs for her email account file and facebook account file. With pride in his voice, he joyously bellowed through the house for her to come to the computer room. As she entered, he proudly told to look at what he had accomplished for her. "Now, you can handle all your billing and computer needs, baby," he said with a smile. He asked for her email ID and password assuming she probably had hundreds of email messages needing to be addressed. Without hesitation, she gave it to him and the email account appeared. ...Smile. Moving onto the Facebook tab, he asked her for the same info, assuming she may have things and people to catch up with. After an awkward pause, she blurted out for him to just delete the page. "Why would you want to do that," he asked? "Cause Facebook only causes trouble," she replied. "Just delete the damn page," she insisted. At this point, he began to assume his angel might have something to hide. His heart rate tripled, as he insisted she have the account pulled up. Prevailing in this measure, first thing he noticed on her page were the unchecked messages. Clicking the message icon, one message stood like the purverbial red thumb. The last statement from some guy was, "..I'm sitting here whacking my meat." OMG!!! My friend nervously, slightly shouted, "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!!!" His girlfriend quitely replied that she didn't know what that was. My friend clicked onto the full message. The message went something like this:
Guy J: so, r u going to be my girl or what?
My friend's girl: Gosh, can't we EVER just have a normal conversation. I don't know yet. Let's wait and see.
Guy J: I'll leave you alone.
My friend's girl: No, wait. I didn't say that. So, what are you doing?
Guy J: sitting here whacking my meat.
My friend, nearly in tears, asked his girl how she could do such a thing. Flipping the script, she yelled that she didn't feel like dealing with this and that he shouldn't read more into this than what is there.
Now, I'm not going to go into their insuing argument because my point is clear. Facebook records one's dastardly deeds. If not on the up-and-up, late night chats and imaginative photos can be the doom to Facebook users and their love ones. Use Facebook wisely.
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Report: Rams Ready To Part Ways With Spagnuolo, McDaniels After The Season
by Ryan Van Bibber on Dec 19, 2011 3:53 PM CST
SB*NATION.NEWSLETTER
At 2-11 with each loss blurring together with the last one, the odds do not favor Steve Spagnuolo keeping his job as head coach of the St. Louis Rams. A report from the San Diego Union Tribune in November noted that team owner Stan Kroenke was already planning make changes at head coach and general manager. Today, Jason LaCanfora of the NFL Network noted something similar, saying on the air that sources told him the Rams plan to "blow things up" after the season ends.
Whether you blame the injuries, the personnel decisions, or the weather, it's pretty tough to stand by what the Rams have done this season.
Lots more after the jump...
There's no shortage of head scratching decisions with this team. Bernie Miklasz noted this morning the coaching staff's stubborn refusal to adapt the game for Sam Bradford similar to what they did with Kellen Clemens and A.J. Feeley. Not hiring a quarterbacks coach looked like a poor decision at the time because of the lockout and a new system. The defense is playing better, after 12 games, but it's notable that last year's group of outside linebackers made for a better unit than this year's group.
Other teams have handled similar injury situations, the Seattle Seahawks for instance, with aplomb. Add in the anecdotal stuff you hear about the coaching staff - e.g. Mike Karney's interview in which he noted Spags barely talks to the players during halftime, telling considering how poorly the team plays after the half - and it's pretty tough sell to keep the coach.
Finally, whether Spagnuolo's a good guy or not, it would be pretty tough to try and sell season tickets, much less get a new stadium, by bringing the same bunch back to lead the team in 2012.
Opinions aside, this is the second high profile report claiming that the Rams will make coaching changes ahead of the 2012 season.
LaCanfora's news does conflict with a report from Adam Schefter over the weekend that the Rams would like to keep McDaniels. With the changes coming in Kansas City, there's plenty of talk that McDaniels could be brought in as the offensive coordinator, where he'd be working for Scott Pioli and with Kyle Orton and Matt Cassel.
As for Spagnuolo, he could probably have his pick of defensive coordinator jobs. Many still believe he could go back to Philly, where Andy Reid once saw him as the eventual successor to Jim Johnson.
For the Rams, it's yet another coaching change, and it's more important than ever that they get it right this time.
SB*NATION.NEWSLETTER
At 2-11 with each loss blurring together with the last one, the odds do not favor Steve Spagnuolo keeping his job as head coach of the St. Louis Rams. A report from the San Diego Union Tribune in November noted that team owner Stan Kroenke was already planning make changes at head coach and general manager. Today, Jason LaCanfora of the NFL Network noted something similar, saying on the air that sources told him the Rams plan to "blow things up" after the season ends.
Whether you blame the injuries, the personnel decisions, or the weather, it's pretty tough to stand by what the Rams have done this season.
Lots more after the jump...
There's no shortage of head scratching decisions with this team. Bernie Miklasz noted this morning the coaching staff's stubborn refusal to adapt the game for Sam Bradford similar to what they did with Kellen Clemens and A.J. Feeley. Not hiring a quarterbacks coach looked like a poor decision at the time because of the lockout and a new system. The defense is playing better, after 12 games, but it's notable that last year's group of outside linebackers made for a better unit than this year's group.
Other teams have handled similar injury situations, the Seattle Seahawks for instance, with aplomb. Add in the anecdotal stuff you hear about the coaching staff - e.g. Mike Karney's interview in which he noted Spags barely talks to the players during halftime, telling considering how poorly the team plays after the half - and it's pretty tough sell to keep the coach.
Finally, whether Spagnuolo's a good guy or not, it would be pretty tough to try and sell season tickets, much less get a new stadium, by bringing the same bunch back to lead the team in 2012.
Opinions aside, this is the second high profile report claiming that the Rams will make coaching changes ahead of the 2012 season.
LaCanfora's news does conflict with a report from Adam Schefter over the weekend that the Rams would like to keep McDaniels. With the changes coming in Kansas City, there's plenty of talk that McDaniels could be brought in as the offensive coordinator, where he'd be working for Scott Pioli and with Kyle Orton and Matt Cassel.
As for Spagnuolo, he could probably have his pick of defensive coordinator jobs. Many still believe he could go back to Philly, where Andy Reid once saw him as the eventual successor to Jim Johnson.
For the Rams, it's yet another coaching change, and it's more important than ever that they get it right this time.
Our friendless society!!!
Here's an important question to answer: right now, if you really needed some help, how many friends do you have that you could call who you know would immediately be there for you?
Still thinking?
This is not good!
You were not made to go it alone.
God created us for relationships with others.
Have you ever realized that four of the Ten Commandments deal with our relationship to God while the remaining six deal with our relationship to each other. All 10 are about relationships.
The most important relationship is a personal relationship with our heavenly Father through His Son Jesus Christ . But we are also supposed to be connected to others.
"Bowling Alone "is the title of a popular book from a few years ago that talked about how we in the United States have become a nation of loners.
This is not good. Doctors tell us that loneliness is a major health problem. A Boston Globe story on the issue reported recently that people who are socially isolated like this but otherwise healthy are twice as likely to die as those who have friends. A similar study fund that isolated men are up to 25% more likely to die of all causes at any age versus non -isolated men. The odds for women are 33%.
George Callup's organization says Americans are among the loneliest people on earth, with more than a third saying they fell isolated and alone.
But George Gallup tells us something else, something he personally discovered that he says is "profoundly good news." Let me quote him:
"I want to report to you now on a trend that may be contributing to a transformation of America. You will not read about this trend in our daily newspapers or on television, yet it is a powerful undercurrent in our society that, I believe, gives us cause for encouragement about the future! This trend could be described as a sociological and spiritual phenomenon: Americans on a massive scale are rediscovering each other, and coming together regularly in small nourishing support groups, many with a spiritual dimension."
The news Gallup discovered is so profound that he has now basically retired from his survey company's day-to-day leadership and has devoted the remaining part of his life to the development and encouragement of small groups. George Gallup, in case you didn't know, is a devout Christian.
Small groups are all about relationships. And that's something that Jesus teaches in the Bible that we are to develop and nurture.
Jesus said our love for each other is to be our witness to the world.
There is nothing intimidating about a Christian small group. They're a lot like families. Think of them as a group of friends who meet regularly to support and encourage one another and to grow in knowledge of the Lord through Bible study, prayer and application.
For most, application means reaching out and helping others, beyond their immediate circule of friends. Many groups have regular outreach projects during the year. There is no shortage of needs. Working at a food pantry, babysitting for single Moms, mentoring school kids and visiting the sick in hospitals are just a few ideas.
Interpersonal relationships bring balance to life. And the best such relationships are when we make connect with others in a basic Christian community.
That's the small group.
If you were to count them all up, the New Testament has over 50 references to how Christians are to be connected in friendship and fellowship. Bible scholars call them the "one another" passages. For example, we're commanded to "love one another", to "pray for one another" and to "build up one another".
It's clear from the Bible that God wants us to be in regular, close fellowship with each other. But such relationships are often the first to be sacrificed to our busy schedules.
This doesn't make sense. For relationships, not wealth or prestige or the accumulation of material things, are what matters most in life.
Now listen. That is just plain wrong. That is sinful. And I say this on the authority of the Bible.
In Matthew 22:36-40. "Jesus said, 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart...soul...and mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and Prophets hang on these two commandments.' "
That's called the Great Commandment.
In Matthew 28:19-20. "Jesus said, 'Go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you.' "
That's called the Great Commission.
Both of those commandments emphasize relationships.
Here's the bottom line: You cannot be the mature believer God intend unless you get involved with people. You will stagnate. It is unbiblical not to be connected with others. Pastor Rick Warren in big Purpose Driven Life Book said it this way: "If you are too busy to be connected you are too busy."
Clearly, we must make friends a priority if we are going to be obedient to God.
This isn't just an idea. It's a command from jesus, who says we are to join together with others and be friends, loving and praying and supporing one another.
What are you waiting for? Join or start a small group today.
Author BioThe author is the publisher of the Online Christian Shopper (www.onlinechristianshopper.com), a shopping site specializing in Christian T-Shirts and Christian jewelry. He also writes the Share Your Testimony evangelism Website (www.sharetestimony.com).
Still thinking?
This is not good!
You were not made to go it alone.
God created us for relationships with others.
Have you ever realized that four of the Ten Commandments deal with our relationship to God while the remaining six deal with our relationship to each other. All 10 are about relationships.
The most important relationship is a personal relationship with our heavenly Father through His Son Jesus Christ . But we are also supposed to be connected to others.
"Bowling Alone "is the title of a popular book from a few years ago that talked about how we in the United States have become a nation of loners.
This is not good. Doctors tell us that loneliness is a major health problem. A Boston Globe story on the issue reported recently that people who are socially isolated like this but otherwise healthy are twice as likely to die as those who have friends. A similar study fund that isolated men are up to 25% more likely to die of all causes at any age versus non -isolated men. The odds for women are 33%.
George Callup's organization says Americans are among the loneliest people on earth, with more than a third saying they fell isolated and alone.
But George Gallup tells us something else, something he personally discovered that he says is "profoundly good news." Let me quote him:
"I want to report to you now on a trend that may be contributing to a transformation of America. You will not read about this trend in our daily newspapers or on television, yet it is a powerful undercurrent in our society that, I believe, gives us cause for encouragement about the future! This trend could be described as a sociological and spiritual phenomenon: Americans on a massive scale are rediscovering each other, and coming together regularly in small nourishing support groups, many with a spiritual dimension."
The news Gallup discovered is so profound that he has now basically retired from his survey company's day-to-day leadership and has devoted the remaining part of his life to the development and encouragement of small groups. George Gallup, in case you didn't know, is a devout Christian.
Small groups are all about relationships. And that's something that Jesus teaches in the Bible that we are to develop and nurture.
Jesus said our love for each other is to be our witness to the world.
There is nothing intimidating about a Christian small group. They're a lot like families. Think of them as a group of friends who meet regularly to support and encourage one another and to grow in knowledge of the Lord through Bible study, prayer and application.
For most, application means reaching out and helping others, beyond their immediate circule of friends. Many groups have regular outreach projects during the year. There is no shortage of needs. Working at a food pantry, babysitting for single Moms, mentoring school kids and visiting the sick in hospitals are just a few ideas.
Interpersonal relationships bring balance to life. And the best such relationships are when we make connect with others in a basic Christian community.
That's the small group.
If you were to count them all up, the New Testament has over 50 references to how Christians are to be connected in friendship and fellowship. Bible scholars call them the "one another" passages. For example, we're commanded to "love one another", to "pray for one another" and to "build up one another".
It's clear from the Bible that God wants us to be in regular, close fellowship with each other. But such relationships are often the first to be sacrificed to our busy schedules.
This doesn't make sense. For relationships, not wealth or prestige or the accumulation of material things, are what matters most in life.
Now listen. That is just plain wrong. That is sinful. And I say this on the authority of the Bible.
In Matthew 22:36-40. "Jesus said, 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart...soul...and mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and Prophets hang on these two commandments.' "
That's called the Great Commandment.
In Matthew 28:19-20. "Jesus said, 'Go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you.' "
That's called the Great Commission.
Both of those commandments emphasize relationships.
Here's the bottom line: You cannot be the mature believer God intend unless you get involved with people. You will stagnate. It is unbiblical not to be connected with others. Pastor Rick Warren in big Purpose Driven Life Book said it this way: "If you are too busy to be connected you are too busy."
Clearly, we must make friends a priority if we are going to be obedient to God.
This isn't just an idea. It's a command from jesus, who says we are to join together with others and be friends, loving and praying and supporing one another.
What are you waiting for? Join or start a small group today.
Author BioThe author is the publisher of the Online Christian Shopper (www.onlinechristianshopper.com), a shopping site specializing in Christian T-Shirts and Christian jewelry. He also writes the Share Your Testimony evangelism Website (www.sharetestimony.com).
Sunday, December 18, 2011
Spiritual Secrets of Concentration
For most of the time, we are barely conscious of what we are about, because there are so many projects, memories, words and images chasing each other rapidly through our brains, overlapping and interlacing in a totally free and chaotic manner.
There are not many people who can decide to devote their attention exclusively to something if only for an hour, and then keep their thoughts on track without getting confused or distracted.
There's right! We disperse and dissipate our mental energy all the time. Sometimes it's possible to concentrate hard in the heat of the moment perhaps when influenced by a powerful emotions or an urgent necessity. But even then, you are sumitting to the situation rather than controlling it.
This is not the deliberate, calm and active kind of concentration Maria Duval wants to discuss with you here - the kind that opens the doors to success and achievement.
In this world, there are students who in two hours flat can produce works that their comrades would find it difficult to accomplish in four hours.
There are people who when presented with a problem to solve, give it about fifteen minutes' thought and them come up with the answer.
There are attorneys or lawyers who only start to study their case files an hour before attending a hearing.
There are surgeons who examine their patient for only ten minutes before carrying out an operation. And who are capable, during the course of this operation, of modifying their technique each time a new factor comes to light.
The truth is that these people perform well because they know how to focus their mind, quickly and effectively. How do they manage to do this?? That's what Maria Duval is about to explain briefly.
Concentration is the power to focus all your psychic forces on a single point at a time, without allowing yourself to be distracted by any events or situations going on around you, says Maria Duval.
If you get a magnifying glass and allow the sunlight to shine through it, the light will be focused to such a point that it can burn many objects and burst into flames. Likewise, if you concentrate on a single issue as hard as you can, without getting distracted, you will experience a flash of enlightment. So using this technique, problems that creep into your mind can be solved after a few minutes of concentration.
Concentration is the faculty that makes people great. If you want to be successful, to do something worthwhile and reach the highest rungs of the social ladder, Maria Duval says it is important that you must learn to channel your attention, your thoughts, your feelings, your desires and your will by focusing them to a single point like the sun's rays.
Individuals who become high-flyers in absolutely any field of human activity, are people who are capable of concentrating their minds. Let Maria Duval explain the two main aspects of concentration, so that we can better understand the mechanisms involved:
- There is one type of concentration that involves regular practise sessions, performed using specific places, times and body postures, and possibly accompanied by certain breathing techniques;
- The other type is brought to bear on life itself, as it happens, with its obvious repetition, but with all its variations and surprises as well.
Author BioArthur Regis is a freelance spiritualist. He practises the spiritual laws based on the teachings of psychic Maria Duval. His blog can be found at Maria Duval's Talisman.
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